It is 7:30 in the morning on Tuesday. I wake up this morning and I feel great. I feel human. I feel a little sleepy, but I feel normal. The round one chemo has left my system and I am a semi-functioning adult. My energy level is back up to where I can walk around a grocery store if need be – before I could force myself to get to the stopsign halfway down the block and back.
Today is a good day.
Today is a dangerous day.
Today is the day we go in to start round 2 of the chemotherapy. 11am. 3 1/2 hours.
Last week I was scared and I didn’t want to do it. The way it makes you feel is difficult to describe. It’s sort of a nauseous feeling that won’t go away plus a feeling of complete and utter hopelessness. Your energy is sapped from your body to the point where even chewing is difficult because it takes too much of your sweet reserves and then both these feelings just stick to you for like fifteen days and it blows hard.
But today I feel good.
Today I feel excited to go in. I watch the clock tick around sometimes and think – every second. Every second I am one second closer to the end of this. I suppose, though, at the end of the day it all comes down to drips. One drip closer, one drop closer.
Gotta get sick to get better.
Just wanted to let everyone know that today the wife and mother and I are ready to go in and fight this for the next five.
Please keep up all the praying. They make me feel grrrrrreat!!!!!